Ep 34 - Four Tips for Constructive and Engaging Feedback

Welcome to this episode of Power Up Your Team podcast! This is your free resource with tips and tricks to build a more resilient team. 

My teachers used to tell me that feedback is a gift. I quickly learned that it’s easy to accept that gift when it’s all positive or when we just get to hear “Well done” or “Awesome job”. It’s easier to receive and also easier to give. 

But what happens when someone really screwed up? And you really just want to give this person a piece of your mind. You want to express how careless their actions were and how they compromised the team’s success. 

That’s when constructive feedback comes in handy so that despite the crisis in the moment, you don’t break relationships, or the trust and confidence of your team members.

I remember a specific feedback session from early in my career where I was on the receiving end. I was new in that company and experienced a very engrained, formal performance review cycle for the first time. 

Our leader asked to see the documentation before we would release it to our employees. 

One day, she called me to her office and sat me down with an all telling smile. I remember sitting in her large office with an adjacent conference room in late afternoon sunlight.  I thought “Oh shoot! What’s coming now?” She patiently read the first observation I had documented. She asked me: “What would you like to see Tim doing instead?” “What was he doing well?”

As we went through my documentation line by line, I shamefully noticed that I had produced a list of grievances. I was thorough – I can tell you that – but I totally missed the mark of what the feedback was meant to do. It would have been such a train wreck had she not guided me in rewriting it. 

I learned how important it is to have a “glass half full” perspective to maintain relationships, trust and pave a path forward towards desirable change. 

In my 30 years of receiving and providing feedback, I have learned a couple of things that are worthwhile to consider. 

It should be specific to a situation

Instead of saying “you always do this …” refer to a specific occurrence: “Yesterday in the meeting this or that happened”. It helps to ensure that your feedback comes across as genuine.

It should relate to a behavior or action not be a judgement of character. 

Instead of saying “You were late again. You are simply unreliable!” make the observation and state the impact that it had on the team: “You were late and we all were losing important meeting time” 

Keep a 4:1 ratio for positive and negative observations

Starting the conversation with four compliments on what was done well, makes the portion where you address an issue much easier to swallow. Some research also indicates a 5: 1 ratio. 

It should include feedforward 

The past can’t be changed and the value of these conversation lie in empowering someone to forge ahead with new beliefs, skills, and actions. 

I have experienced different levels of formality in receiving feedback. It can range from an informal conversation or a documented review. 

I believe that in organizations where empowering feedback is given regularly, the documented review can be dropped altogether.

So, make giving feedback your leadership habit. Ensure it’s part of every conversation so your team can contribute at a higher level and you can achieve the next level of success for your business.